The Impressive Juxtaposition of Beauty and Anger

Last week was - indescribable. I felt like at least fifteen different people, all warring together to decide what exactly was going on.
On Tuesday I went to Starbucks with a friend from church to study. I had my second pumpkin latte of the season, which was all joy and delight. Did you know if you stay late you can get a free cake pop while they're cleaning up for the night? Salted Carmel - oh yum!
On Friday, I got yelled at. The entire week had been an utter work disaster, all revolving around one particular client going into a mental health institute and absolutely nobody in the universe wanting to take on responsibility for the client. On Friday, the client's guardian got ahold of me. Suffice to say, she does not like me. At all.
On Saturday, my friend from work took me to school, since it was football Saturday and there would be nowhere to park. I hate football Saturdays - I'm paying a bazillion dollars to go there, why can't I park  regardless of a bunch of men running around throwing a ball at each other?!
My mother had read my paper for me, and sent me an updated copy - only when I went to print it, there was no attatchment. In the scramble to take care of that, I had no coffee or breakfast and only just made it out the door to be picked up.
I climbed in the car and my friend said, oh hey we went to the bakery on the way, would you like a doughnut? Oh and I bought you a cup of coffee.
I felt the smile of the Lord on me in that moment. I almost melted.
After school we went to Panera for lunch, and then to Target. It was a perfect day.
On Monday, my body developed a new symptom of my as-yet-undiagnosed disease, and began cramping in on itself quite severely, particularly my right arm. I spent the day in pain, and not able to do my job the way I would have liked. Same thing Tuesday.
However, Tuesday I went and got my hair all fixed up - trimmed, and for the first time ever, highlighted. Copper. The lady who did it shampooed my hair and spent probably ten minutes doing so, massaging all over and down into my neck muscles, in knots from the spasms. You guys, I thought I had turned to liquid.
Today I missed my dentist appointment entirely, thinking it was 9:40 instead of 9:20. I can barely look the lady behind the desk in the eye, and I had to reschedule which is just a pain.
Then I went to the eye doctor and they said the chemical interaction between my contacts and lens solution has damaged my eyes - I didn't even notice - and I have to wear glasses for a week and take antibiotic eye drops three times a day, then go back AGAIN for a prescription for new contacts.
There are some days that would have been better not being, in my humble opinion.
However, today I got to pretend I was a famous author, spending daytime hours tapping away at my novel and making the first substantial progress in two weeks. And, my mom and sister are coming for the weekend.

Strange, isn't it, how life so often brings us rather more than we can comprehend, things one after another and the good and bad mingled so closely together that we cannot celebrate without a tinge of pain, cannot mourn without an infusion of delight. I'm not entirely sure which way is up, today is one of those days where so much happens and has happened that the heart just weeps for confusion. But even in the weeping, I am aware of the glorious cool breeze and the charm of my flowers, and a peace that passes understanding. I guess that's what it is to be alive.