When you like to write, you sometimes get a teensy bit of a God-complex about your story. You know every tiny detail of every word, thought, and interaction every one of your characters will have from beginning to end.
And then you start to write.
And it allllll falls apart.
I was telling a friend of mine that I am going to do Nanowrimo and convincing her to do it with me, and as we were talking about it I gave her the synopsis of my plot, using your average filler "blah-blah-blah" for the parts i wasn't entirely clear on. When she teased me about it I pronounced my wording epic, and added that I didn't know yet whether the end of the book I've chosen to write is going to be poignant and haunting or sweet and charming. This is what she said:
"I guess it might be one of those instances where you won't know until the end. Let the story speak to you.
And if it says "blah-blah-blah" hold out for something a bit more profound. Because no, it is not epic."
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Minnesota Wish List
Today I am going to give myself a giant imaginary gift all about my roots:
Good old MN!!
The things I would put inside would be:
Minnesota gear - comfy sweatshirt, cozy sweatpants, probably a knit hat and maybe some mittens
Coffee: the goodness of Caribou! and probably a giftcard so the next time I'm home I can go there with my sisters.
Some kind of MN history book - because I grew up on MN history thanks to my dad, and I kind of miss it sometimes.
Minnesota postcards
Cheesy little touristy things like the license plate name tags and homemade soaps and stuff
A snowglobe with Minnesota in it, or pine trees or some such nonsense
Something totally kitschy like a mini Paul Bunyan
A Twins shirt - because I never cared about them, but now that I am in enemy territory I care just on principle.
A Target giftcard, because there's no Target for miles and miles and miles here.
A couple hotdish recipes - or preferably the hotdish itself.
The movie New in Town - for a touch of home...as others see it, since I never knew a single person who had "The Accent".
Posters for my wall - the awesome ones the history center had of split rock lighthouse and downtown areas in primary colors.
And of course, notes from all my lovelies at home.
If you were going to create a package from your favorite place, one you've been to, are in now, or want to go someday, what would you put inside?
Good old MN!!
The things I would put inside would be:
Minnesota gear - comfy sweatshirt, cozy sweatpants, probably a knit hat and maybe some mittens
Coffee: the goodness of Caribou! and probably a giftcard so the next time I'm home I can go there with my sisters.
Some kind of MN history book - because I grew up on MN history thanks to my dad, and I kind of miss it sometimes.
Minnesota postcards
Cheesy little touristy things like the license plate name tags and homemade soaps and stuff
A snowglobe with Minnesota in it, or pine trees or some such nonsense
Something totally kitschy like a mini Paul Bunyan
A Twins shirt - because I never cared about them, but now that I am in enemy territory I care just on principle.
A Target giftcard, because there's no Target for miles and miles and miles here.
A couple hotdish recipes - or preferably the hotdish itself.
The movie New in Town - for a touch of home...as others see it, since I never knew a single person who had "The Accent".
Posters for my wall - the awesome ones the history center had of split rock lighthouse and downtown areas in primary colors.
And of course, notes from all my lovelies at home.
If you were going to create a package from your favorite place, one you've been to, are in now, or want to go someday, what would you put inside?
Friday, October 14, 2011
Featuring...
First of all, true admission: It took me awhile to spell featuring correctly. I'd like to blame this on the 11:30 time, but truth is I just fail at certain words.
Second, I got a twitter: invincibleblogj. Mostly, I got it so I could get Pinterest!! But, if you happen to be a fan of Twitter and want to tell me how it works or want me to follow you or whatever it is one does on there, let me know.
And finally, most importantly:
the Feature.
One of my best friends, Kiah Tomatz, is a very talented woman. She does great design work (you can find her here), but she also is a very lovely musician.
Fun facts about Kiah:
1)I still have the notebooks we passed notes in in highschool: mainly they consist of her saying "write me back!" and me saying "Leave me alone I'm reading my book!"
2) Kiah is the most flexible person I know - seriously! the world's highest Russians
3) The very first time I ever used an IM-like-program was on a computer at her house. She was tech savvy, cool, and in the know, and me, well, I wrote a 1,000 word novel instead of a short and sweet line of text. in fact,
4) She's pretty awesome. Beautiful, talented and accomplished - so much so that I don't know why she still hangs out with me, my books, and my I Love Lucy obsession.
So, in honor of the weekend and finding good things to enjoy, I am showcasing some of her videos here and I encourage you to explore more and be delighted.
Happy weekend friends!
Second, I got a twitter: invincibleblogj. Mostly, I got it so I could get Pinterest!! But, if you happen to be a fan of Twitter and want to tell me how it works or want me to follow you or whatever it is one does on there, let me know.
And finally, most importantly:
the Feature.
One of my best friends, Kiah Tomatz, is a very talented woman. She does great design work (you can find her here), but she also is a very lovely musician.
Fun facts about Kiah:
1)I still have the notebooks we passed notes in in highschool: mainly they consist of her saying "write me back!" and me saying "Leave me alone I'm reading my book!"
2) Kiah is the most flexible person I know - seriously! the world's highest Russians
3) The very first time I ever used an IM-like-program was on a computer at her house. She was tech savvy, cool, and in the know, and me, well, I wrote a 1,000 word novel instead of a short and sweet line of text. in fact,
4) She's pretty awesome. Beautiful, talented and accomplished - so much so that I don't know why she still hangs out with me, my books, and my I Love Lucy obsession.
So, in honor of the weekend and finding good things to enjoy, I am showcasing some of her videos here and I encourage you to explore more and be delighted.
Happy weekend friends!
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Making the world
I am still sick. I have half a voice. I went to a fabulous training on POA/guardianship this afternoon. I had orange chicken and white rice for lunch. My lungs feel like bricks. I wish I had cable so I could watch the Psych premiere.
The sun is setting. My favorite candle is burning on the table. There is no greater joy than learning the one thing that suddenly makes an answer spark out at you.
I am making my world more beautiful by the eyes with which I choose to see it.
The sun is setting. My favorite candle is burning on the table. There is no greater joy than learning the one thing that suddenly makes an answer spark out at you.
I am making my world more beautiful by the eyes with which I choose to see it.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Discovery
Today my words won't be enough.
Remember yesterday? The questions about the Dream?
I got just the teensiest bit of an answer today.
October 11 - After God's Silence - what?
Has God trusted you with a silence - a silence that is big with meaning? God's silences are His answers. Think of those days of absolute silence in the home at Bethany! Is there anything analogous to those days in your life? Can God trust you like that, or are you still asking for a visible answer? God will give you the blessings you ask if you will not go any further without them; but His silence is the sign that He is bringing you into a marvelous understanding of Himself. Are you mourning before God because you have not had an audible response? You will find that God has trusted you in the most intimate way possible, with an absolute silence, not of despair, but of pleasure, because He saw that you could stand a bigger revelation. If God has given you a silence, praise him, He is bringing you into the great run of His purposes. The manifestation of the answer in time is a matter of God's sovereignty. Time is nothing to God. For a while you said - "I asked God to give me bread, and He gave me a stone."He did not, and today you find He gave you the bread of life. A wonderful thing about God's silence is that the contagion of His stillness gets into you and you become perfectly confident - "I know God has heard me." His silence is the proof that He has. As long as you have the idea that God will bless you in answer to prayer, He will do it, but He will never give you the grace of silence. If Jesus Christ is bringing you into the understanding that prayer is for the glorifying of His Father, He will give you the first sign of His intimacy - silence.
Oswald Chambers
Remember yesterday? The questions about the Dream?
I got just the teensiest bit of an answer today.
October 11 - After God's Silence - what?
Has God trusted you with a silence - a silence that is big with meaning? God's silences are His answers. Think of those days of absolute silence in the home at Bethany! Is there anything analogous to those days in your life? Can God trust you like that, or are you still asking for a visible answer? God will give you the blessings you ask if you will not go any further without them; but His silence is the sign that He is bringing you into a marvelous understanding of Himself. Are you mourning before God because you have not had an audible response? You will find that God has trusted you in the most intimate way possible, with an absolute silence, not of despair, but of pleasure, because He saw that you could stand a bigger revelation. If God has given you a silence, praise him, He is bringing you into the great run of His purposes. The manifestation of the answer in time is a matter of God's sovereignty. Time is nothing to God. For a while you said - "I asked God to give me bread, and He gave me a stone."He did not, and today you find He gave you the bread of life. A wonderful thing about God's silence is that the contagion of His stillness gets into you and you become perfectly confident - "I know God has heard me." His silence is the proof that He has. As long as you have the idea that God will bless you in answer to prayer, He will do it, but He will never give you the grace of silence. If Jesus Christ is bringing you into the understanding that prayer is for the glorifying of His Father, He will give you the first sign of His intimacy - silence.
Oswald Chambers
Monday, October 10, 2011
live the dream
What do your dreams look like?
Dreams are a hard thing to nail down.
So many things are impossible, no matter how much people tell you to just follow them, some things really are impractical, irresponsible, or some other combination of unrealities.
I know my dream is to serve people. I know my passion is being with other people and meeting needs.
My dream used to be going overseas to work, to dive into those big situations.
But what happens when your dreams and your heart don't line up?
My dreams are big.
My heart belongs to home.
I want to someday climb to the top of the Eiffel tower and wrap my arms around someone I love and dream that we own the world together.
I want to take words, my words, and reach inside of someone and reveal something they never saw before.
I want to bring a marvel.
I love books.
I love fall and sunshine and playing the piano and coffee and reading and laughing and making other people happy.
I love the thing I've had just a few times in my life: the moment when you dive in and believe so deeply in what you are doing that everything else is just that something extra. The times when life takes on a glow, when you can pour your heart out and still find it full.
Here's what I know.
Somehow, somewhere in this world, there is a way to combine the things I love:
being sunshine
Books
The elderly
joy
passion
playing piano
words
hope
companionship
meeting physical needs
kids
meeting new people
variety
making people feel welcome
restoration
the great cause
Together, into some kind of perfect God-given whole.
But how do I find it?
I've always taken this verse to mean that, if I let Him, He will clear away all the many little distractions that come along: that in the end, the path He takes me on will be the perfect one, and He alone will show me the true desires He placed deep inside my heart.
Dreams are a hard thing to nail down.
So many things are impossible, no matter how much people tell you to just follow them, some things really are impractical, irresponsible, or some other combination of unrealities.
I know my dream is to serve people. I know my passion is being with other people and meeting needs.
My dream used to be going overseas to work, to dive into those big situations.
But what happens when your dreams and your heart don't line up?
My dreams are big.
My heart belongs to home.
I want to someday climb to the top of the Eiffel tower and wrap my arms around someone I love and dream that we own the world together.
I want to take words, my words, and reach inside of someone and reveal something they never saw before.
I want to bring a marvel.
I love books.
I love fall and sunshine and playing the piano and coffee and reading and laughing and making other people happy.
I love the thing I've had just a few times in my life: the moment when you dive in and believe so deeply in what you are doing that everything else is just that something extra. The times when life takes on a glow, when you can pour your heart out and still find it full.
Here's what I know.
Somehow, somewhere in this world, there is a way to combine the things I love:
being sunshine
Books
The elderly
joy
passion
playing piano
words
hope
companionship
meeting physical needs
kids
meeting new people
variety
making people feel welcome
restoration
the great cause
Together, into some kind of perfect God-given whole.
But how do I find it?
Roadblock: sick
why is it that every time you (meaning the collective us) start something with determination (read: getting into shape - I got up at 6 and exercised and I ate five small meals and managed my hunger as well as fitting in vegetables), something rises up to get in the way?
I started having a sore throat this afternoon - I thought it was because I drank diet Cherry Pepsi and I am allergic to lots (but not all) cherry things, but it has persisted and been joined by a dry nose - you know the feeling where the sides of your face by your nose feel swollen and your nose is dry as dust inside? - and I have been pouring sweat despite not moving since dinner two hours ago.
Blech.
I plan to pull up my hair, put my pajamas on, put my glasses on, watch Hawaii five-0 and drink some chai tea and go to bed early.
What do you guys do to baby yourself or cure yourself when you're sick??
i hate being sick.
I started having a sore throat this afternoon - I thought it was because I drank diet Cherry Pepsi and I am allergic to lots (but not all) cherry things, but it has persisted and been joined by a dry nose - you know the feeling where the sides of your face by your nose feel swollen and your nose is dry as dust inside? - and I have been pouring sweat despite not moving since dinner two hours ago.
Blech.
I plan to pull up my hair, put my pajamas on, put my glasses on, watch Hawaii five-0 and drink some chai tea and go to bed early.
What do you guys do to baby yourself or cure yourself when you're sick??
i hate being sick.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Weekend Recap
Well I finally took the time to get some photos off my camera again - remember that recipe I gave you a link to awhile back, for the brownie in a mug? it's AMAZING. It looks like this:
I didn't have any cocoa like the recipe asked for, so I just made the batter with the peanut butter and threw in the chocolate chips and it worked out just fine - heavenly, in fact!
I had a blast at the wedding this weekend! There are no pictures however, because like a fool I neglected to bring my camera with me. Someday, I will get better at this. Of course someday, maybe I will have a camera that takes decent pictures.
I got pretty adventurous tonight: first, I went on a super fun website that offers a great window into your fashion - awesome for those of us who are what you might call "not gifted" in the whole fashion thing.
I also concocted my own recipe to use up the eggplant I purchased specifically to teach myself how to make eggplant.
I cut half the eggplant into slices and tossed them in a frying pan with some tomatoes, a little olive oil, and some garlic salt
I browned the eggplant, and while I was doing that I toasted an English muffin from the good old IGA store.
After the eggplant was well-browned, I layered half of the tomatoes on each half of the English muffin and topped those with slices of the eggplant. I sprinkled a little more olive oil on, and then added mozzarella cheese over the top of them.
I did have to throw them in the microwave to finish melting the cheese, but overall they were pretty good. I can't say I adore the texture of the eggplant but I can deal with it, and this was a tasty and healthy meal. Of course I had to finish it off with the world's best gift to man.
Aldi's brand my friends. It will change your life.
Anyways, that's all the news I think. Got any updates from your weekend?? Hope it was great!
I had a blast at the wedding this weekend! There are no pictures however, because like a fool I neglected to bring my camera with me. Someday, I will get better at this. Of course someday, maybe I will have a camera that takes decent pictures.
I got pretty adventurous tonight: first, I went on a super fun website that offers a great window into your fashion - awesome for those of us who are what you might call "not gifted" in the whole fashion thing.
I also concocted my own recipe to use up the eggplant I purchased specifically to teach myself how to make eggplant.
I cut half the eggplant into slices and tossed them in a frying pan with some tomatoes, a little olive oil, and some garlic salt
Anyways, that's all the news I think. Got any updates from your weekend?? Hope it was great!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Cross the Shifting Sands
First things first: the title is irrelevant. But it would be an awesome book title don't you think?
I had QUITE a day at work - I leave you to fill in the shadows behind the quite.
I went grocery and household shopping on the way home from work, because my mom and youngest sister will be in and out this weekend so I figured my usual maybe-I'll-eat-maybe-I-won't-grab-the-first-thing-I-see meals weren't going to cut it.
I sort of skipped dinner, not going to lie. And I had Mcdonalds for lunch. This is why I'm pretty sure my nutrition panel, if done, would be rock bottom. It's not that I don't like healthy stuff, it's just so much more bother.
I watched I Love Lucy, and Person of Interest, and the Mentalist, however I missed most of all of them because of the following:
I baked two loaves of pumpkin bread from scratch. I baked brownies from a box. I cleaned my toilet. I gave myself a facial (avocado and oatmeal for under 2$ at walmart!). I read all my blogs. I put away all the stuff I bought. And I picked out half the accessories for my wedding outfit. But then I talked to my sister on the phone, and something about the color combinations as I described them to her apparently didn't pass muster. I'm trying to decide if I care enough to go through that mess of choosing again.
And now, I plan to be thoroughly irresponsible. Is it a work night? yes. Should I be in bed? yes. Will I hate myself tomorrow? Most assuredly. But I'm going to stay up, put some clothes away, have a piece of my pumpkin bread, and watch my favorite-est movie - One Night with the King. I read Isaiah 40 this morning, and when I did all I could hear was Mordecai reading it in his deep English voice and I knew I couldn't sleep without watching it.
p.s. - remind me to tell you a story about sleeping.
If I don't write again for awhile, don't hate me - it's gonna be a great weekend!
I had QUITE a day at work - I leave you to fill in the shadows behind the quite.
I went grocery and household shopping on the way home from work, because my mom and youngest sister will be in and out this weekend so I figured my usual maybe-I'll-eat-maybe-I-won't-grab-the-first-thing-I-see meals weren't going to cut it.
I sort of skipped dinner, not going to lie. And I had Mcdonalds for lunch. This is why I'm pretty sure my nutrition panel, if done, would be rock bottom. It's not that I don't like healthy stuff, it's just so much more bother.
I watched I Love Lucy, and Person of Interest, and the Mentalist, however I missed most of all of them because of the following:
I baked two loaves of pumpkin bread from scratch. I baked brownies from a box. I cleaned my toilet. I gave myself a facial (avocado and oatmeal for under 2$ at walmart!). I read all my blogs. I put away all the stuff I bought. And I picked out half the accessories for my wedding outfit. But then I talked to my sister on the phone, and something about the color combinations as I described them to her apparently didn't pass muster. I'm trying to decide if I care enough to go through that mess of choosing again.
And now, I plan to be thoroughly irresponsible. Is it a work night? yes. Should I be in bed? yes. Will I hate myself tomorrow? Most assuredly. But I'm going to stay up, put some clothes away, have a piece of my pumpkin bread, and watch my favorite-est movie - One Night with the King. I read Isaiah 40 this morning, and when I did all I could hear was Mordecai reading it in his deep English voice and I knew I couldn't sleep without watching it.
p.s. - remind me to tell you a story about sleeping.
If I don't write again for awhile, don't hate me - it's gonna be a great weekend!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Wantings and Havings
This is going to be random - not that I'm ever NOT random., but this might be somewhat more than usual. Prepare yourselves.
I have started my Christmas list already. On it you will find a pair of TOMS, the last couple seasons of I Love Lucy, fuzzy slippers, the latest NCIS, a mac computer, and this:
Which just so happens to be a shirt from Forever 21 featuring my absolute favorite of all time, I Love Lucy. So in love right now.
I found some super cool/funny/interesting things while trolling about this evening:
1) Freerice.com. Go there.
2)This recipe, which I fully intend to try as soon as I am done here.
3) This hilarious list:
4) College Fashion - google it and go to the website, I love poking around there.
5) And this website - I was laughing out loud at some of them.
I went shopping at Maurice's today - is it just me or is there something awfully enticing about that place? They just luuuuure me in, with their lovely minty colors and gorgeous designs and 10 for 10 punch cards....and then suddenly I am left dazed on the pavement much poorer than I was.
Anyways, I bought a dress for the family wedding I have this weekend: super gorgeous, but it's cream, which is not a color my clumsy self typically wears, and it's a little shorter than I would usually wear. I'm excited though!
I also bought a couple sweaters, including one I would like to start living in, and a couple shirts as well as dress pants for work.
I saw a nifty Idea on a website today, and it was all about finding 60 things everyday that you have and want to have again - things within your power basically. So here's some of mine from today, to give you an idea:
1) Beautiful sunrise 2) Good cup of coffee 3) Awesome two-hour visit with a splendid old lady 4) Fabulous shopping trip 5) Wore a soft sweater
And so forth...basically it help you realize the value of your life, and the things in it that make it that way so you can replicate them. Told you it was nifty.
Final thought, promise: I am copying the writing on the side panel of my Maurice's bag because I just like it. So, from me and Maurice's to you:
"My bedroom closet is my sanctuary, my confessional, my runway. It is the place where with damp towel and fuzzy slippers, I transform into the woman I hope to be. The place I pretend to fire my boss, kiss my boyfriend, and play dress up. My closet is filled with low-rise jeans, a sweater that witnessed the first date with my fiance, a bikini I'm planning to fit into and the wrap I'm planning to cover it all up with. It's where I dress for brunches, beaches, boardrooms and bull-fights. (I'm not sure what one wears to a bullfight but it was a spread in a magazine once.) My closet is where I practice pirouettes, check the progress of my bangs, and tape my crumbling homecoming corsage, crinkled pictures of celebrities, and looks I love onto the full-length mirror. It's where I've vowed to someday marry against a slew of ugly bridesmaid dresses."
I have started my Christmas list already. On it you will find a pair of TOMS, the last couple seasons of I Love Lucy, fuzzy slippers, the latest NCIS, a mac computer, and this:
I found some super cool/funny/interesting things while trolling about this evening:
1) Freerice.com. Go there.
2)This recipe, which I fully intend to try as soon as I am done here.
4) College Fashion - google it and go to the website, I love poking around there.
5) And this website - I was laughing out loud at some of them.
I went shopping at Maurice's today - is it just me or is there something awfully enticing about that place? They just luuuuure me in, with their lovely minty colors and gorgeous designs and 10 for 10 punch cards....and then suddenly I am left dazed on the pavement much poorer than I was.
Anyways, I bought a dress for the family wedding I have this weekend: super gorgeous, but it's cream, which is not a color my clumsy self typically wears, and it's a little shorter than I would usually wear. I'm excited though!
I also bought a couple sweaters, including one I would like to start living in, and a couple shirts as well as dress pants for work.
I saw a nifty Idea on a website today, and it was all about finding 60 things everyday that you have and want to have again - things within your power basically. So here's some of mine from today, to give you an idea:
1) Beautiful sunrise 2) Good cup of coffee 3) Awesome two-hour visit with a splendid old lady 4) Fabulous shopping trip 5) Wore a soft sweater
And so forth...basically it help you realize the value of your life, and the things in it that make it that way so you can replicate them. Told you it was nifty.
Final thought, promise: I am copying the writing on the side panel of my Maurice's bag because I just like it. So, from me and Maurice's to you:
"My bedroom closet is my sanctuary, my confessional, my runway. It is the place where with damp towel and fuzzy slippers, I transform into the woman I hope to be. The place I pretend to fire my boss, kiss my boyfriend, and play dress up. My closet is filled with low-rise jeans, a sweater that witnessed the first date with my fiance, a bikini I'm planning to fit into and the wrap I'm planning to cover it all up with. It's where I dress for brunches, beaches, boardrooms and bull-fights. (I'm not sure what one wears to a bullfight but it was a spread in a magazine once.) My closet is where I practice pirouettes, check the progress of my bangs, and tape my crumbling homecoming corsage, crinkled pictures of celebrities, and looks I love onto the full-length mirror. It's where I've vowed to someday marry against a slew of ugly bridesmaid dresses."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)